Reviews
Helloween: The time of the oath
28/01/11 || revenant
There was a period, many years ago now, when I thought that power metal was the thing for me. It actually made a lot of sense to me back then (in theory), ticking a lot of boxes under the “shit I like to hear in music” list. I like fast, melodic guitar playing. Power metal has that? Check. I quite liked operatic style vocals (I was listening to a lot of Maiden at the time). Fucken check. And did you say this shit had catchy choruses as well? Bring that fucken shit on already!
So my first trial of the power metal genre came in the form of Helloween’s monster “Walls of Jericho”. If ever there was an album to justify my above thinking that power metal was my thing, this was it. Oh sure, that album is cheesier than a three cheese pizza (seriously, two songs about metal, come on guys!), but the furious speed metal riffing and catchiness sure worked for me. Thinking I was on a good thing, I stuck with Helloween for my second foray into power metal and purchased “The Time of the Oath”.
Urrrgggghhhkkkk (that’s a strangled cry in case you’re wondering), what the fuck is this? Where have Helloween’s balls gone?
It was a rude awakening to the bad side of power metal. Oh sure, “The Time of the Oath” retains the speed of Helloween’s earlier work, but any aggression that had been in the earlier effort had been replaced with ridiculous over the top melodies so rich with cheese it’s enough to make you sick.
Part of my issue with this album stems from the vocal performance. Where the more raw and raspy Hansen vocals created a more nasty atmosphere, Deris’ clean falsetto vocals are sickly. Of course Deris didn’t replace Hansen, but I had completely skipped the Kiske years in buying this record second (and for the record Deris is no match for Kiske either, who was much more powerful than Deris has ever been), but regardless of who he replaced the point is this: falsetto + cheesy melody = silly vocals with no balls. I like my vocals raw and rough, metal needs a harder edge, and these vocals remove that edge completely. I will admit I do, on the odd occasion, growl or shout along with music (I’m not vain enough to call this performance singing, because singing it ain’t), and have in past caught myself vocalising a little “Mission Motherland” or “Wake Up the Mountain”, only to look furtively around to make sure no one caught me in the act. It’s one thing to be caught doing it, it’s quite another to be doing it with a girly falsetto voice.
The music, outside the vocals, is also supremely melodic. It’s not just the vocals that stick in your head, it’s all those fucken didly-didly-didly guitar melodies as well. This bit I actually don’t mind so much – though I would probably have preferred to see the odd thrashier riff thrown in here or there – because the speed and precision in which these are executed are quite phenomenal. The guitar solos, too, are very impressive and intricate. Musically I can’t fault the album, but its heavy focus on melody and not on ballsy crunching does get a bit much.
Have I mentioned the ballads yet? No? Well there’s fucken over the top love ballads on this album as well. I hate over the top love ballads. “Forever and One” makes me want to shoot myself with a bazooka (hey, why risk the chance of survival with a lousy pistol?), that’s how bad it is. Just hearing the song title and knowing it’s a ballad should be enough for you to know this is to be avoided. But one love ballad isn’t enough (apparently), so Helloween threw in “If I Knew” as well. Aaarrgggghhhh!
And since I’m in the mood for bitching, I might as well air my other grievance I have with this album: the song “Anything My Momma Don’t Like”. Fuck off. Stupid song title and dumb fucken chorus that is impossible not to get stuck in your head. I fucking hate this song more than I hate those cunts who come bearing Bibles and knock on you door 7am on a Saturday morning. “Have you heard the word of God?”. No, now fuck off before you feel the wrath of Satan.
So there are probably a bunch of people who will bitch about my harsh view of this album. Those people are the power metal fans. Now they are probably right to bitch to a degree; for a power metal album this is pretty well executed. But for me the singing and the melody will be just too much to stomach. The 3 cheese pizza I mentioned above sounds bad enough, but try adding another few cheeses to it before eating and stomach that shit. This album helped me learn power metal is not my thing, and for me this albums gets…

…but for the power metal fans, a more realistic score for you is:

- Information
- Released: 1996
- Label: Raw Power
- Website: www.helloween.org
- Band
- Andi Deris: vocals
- Michael Weikath: guitars
- Roland Grapow: guitars
- Markus Grosskopf: bass
- Uli Kusch: drums
- Tracklist
- 01. We Burn
- 02. Steel Tormentor
- 03. Wake Up the Mountain
- 04. Power
- 05. Forever and One (Neverland)
- 06. Before the War
- 07. A Million to One
- 08. Anything My Mama Don’t Like (again: fuck off)
- 09. Kings Will Be Kings
- 10. Mission Motherland
- 11. If I Knew
- 12. The Time of the Oath
